it's been an odd week....a lot of 'heaviness' in the air. there've been more than the usual number of spats and aggravations in our little abode. i think cabin-fever has reached it's peak and we're all quite ready for spring.
i woke up this morning thinking i wanted to open the windows. which i did, ever so briefly...but, oh - what a difference! it gives one hope. :)
~
most mornings of late i'm woken by the tip-tapping of doggie feet around the bedroom -- our ancient boy Tyler can't quite hold his bladder like he did in his younger days and nature's call is coming ever earlier. apparently i wasn't quick enough out of bed today and i followed him to Sebastian's room where i caught him lifting his leg against the table (Tyler, that is). i'm not sure he even realized what he was doing. thus it is to be an old dog.
~
i'm reading Lord of the Rings -- first time, although i've had the book for years. (GASP! i know, right? where have i been?). i haven't got far - i'm exhausted by bedtime these days -- but i've found the foreword to be of great interest and have enjoyed a quiet giggle at the way Mr.Tolkein views his critics. this also stood out {on the topic of suggested motive and meaning of his story} ...
"The prime motive was the desire of the tale-teller to try his hand at a really long story that would hold the attention of readers, amuse them, delight them, and at times maybe excite them or deeply move them. As a guide I had only my own feelings for what is appealing or moving, and for many the guide was inevitably at fault."
this actually brought tears to my eyes....because i think it's a lovely way to look at life in general; that if we act from a desire to amuse and delight, to share and encourage then we are approaching our lives with a beautiful purpose. inevitably, someone is gonna dump all over it, but that needn't be our concern. i think that's the part i struggle with most....the surrendering of perspective.
~
and there was art commissioned for the downstairs-bathroom wall. i'm on a mission of un-beige -- i don't fancy painting the walls from their delightful shade of industrial beige (far too much upheaval involved there)...i much prefer the splashes of colour a smattering of fabulous art can provide.
from the Creature Feature series...by Savannah
B was away on biz-ness on Friday and Saturday so there were bonus trips to Nanna and Grandad's and the baking of brownies and procurement of ice-cream for a movie night. we watched Skellig the Owl Man....absolutely wonderful.
and in amongst all that....we just carry on as we are.
i knew the moment he was conceived and a short while later, he told me his name.
i asked him not to come until he was ready -- the trauma of his sister's early arrival still hanging over my heart -- and he ventured forth on exactly his due date.
i wrote him a letter a few days after he was born, as i'd done for his sister before him, and in it i named him my 'child of peace'.
as an infant, where his sister had screamed bloody murder for the first five months and torn my soul into tatters, he smiled a lot and loved to be cuddled.
he was exactly what i needed to heal my heart; to show me that perhaps i wasn't such a failure after all.
when he turned a year, he didn't delight in the party we gave him the way most yearlings do -- basking in the adoration of his family and friends who all waited expectantly for that Kodak moment of cake-smearing and a first taste of ice-cream.
instead he screamed until i swooped him away to a quiet place -- just he and i and the silence.
after that, any attempt at going out was near impossible. at the grocery store he'd scream if anyone looked at him...when he got bigger and was walking, he'd lie down in the aisle and cry until i picked him up and took him out.
eventually, we rearranged things so he wouldn't have to go out in public.
naturally, everyone thought there was something *wrong* with him.
"he must be autistic, you should have him tested"
i ignored them, but secretly researched autism in the dark of the night when everyone slept. in the depths of my mama's heart - that place where you really Know - i knew there was nothing wrong with this magical boy who loved so fiercely and whose eyes crackled with sparks of joy every time he smiled.
when he was 19 months old and not talking i did have him assessed -- only to be sure there was no physical reason for him not doing the usual babbling and chattering. all that was fine, but the speech pathologist insisted he needed 'intervention' and put him on a waiting list. they finally called when he was three but we had never needed it. she told me how to direct his play and encourage him to make noises with his trains and animals. i knew that would never fly, he was always very intense -- yes, he lined them up in fine autist fashion -- obsessing over making sure they were just-so -- there was no way he'd allow me to join in uninvited and i certainly couldn't be the one driving the bus! so i nodded and smiled and thanked her...and took my perfect child home. we never had trouble communicating...if he wanted a sandwich, he'd bring us a loaf of bread and the jar of peanut butter. we learned how to communicate without speech.
from about 10 months of age onwards, his sleep patterns were governed by the phases of the moon. he is restless and wakeful prior to both the New and the Full....it's easier now because he's old enough to entertain himself while one of us dozes -- he falls asleep when he's ready. trying to regiment that has never been successful -- forcing an early 'bedtime' means he's awake at 3am and raring to go. eventually, he taught us to honour his cycle.
he's 6 now. he's not a typical 6 year old boy and going places and doing certain things still involves a degree of challenge. he doesn't always transition well and immerses himself deeply and intensely in activities -- he sucks the marrow dry before he moves onto the next thing -- apparently 6 year old boys aren't supposed to to that -- so typical 'groups' and activities don't fit our style. we can't take part in structured activities -- but really, who's to say that's the only way, anyway? he opened the door to unschooling -- and we gladly walked through it.
i still find myself at odds with Common Belief -- that he should have had speech therapy; that he should be forced to do this, that and the other; that he should be expected to behave in a certain way in certain situations. and in the moments that i wonder if maybe everyone else is right and i'm the one who's wrong -- for stubbornly defending this child's right to be his own person -- i remember everything he's taught me; i remember how he has challenged everything i thought i knew about parenting and the world; how i've had to stretch further and harder to meet his needs -- all of which he has the Divine right to have taken care of....by the simple truth that he Is. and when i remember these things i remember that he's perfect.
every child is born Perfect
it is not our job as parents and adults to mold these children into our own ideal of what they should be. if you look around -- even in the so-called Positive Parenting movement, the subtle signs of manipulation are there. well-meaning, i've no doubt -- but designed to funnel development along a prescribed route. most of us may have unknowingly done that -- i was doing it with Savannah until her brother showed me that it could be different.
that it could be so much different. and that we'd be all the better for his gifts.
i have a hard time, still, sharing my boy-child -- he defies definition...describing a day with him would be beyond difficult. but i've realized recently, that my decision not to share him is based in fear. i feel tremendously protective of him...and fiercely defend him and his right to be himself....and i'm afraid -- afraid that he will be judged, that he will be seen as somehow Less....simply because he drums his own rhythm.
and sometimes i'm afraid that i've got it all wrong and that i've failed him in my own stubbornness and blind love.
and so, again, it comes down to a matter of faith. and trust. and the ferocious love i have for my boy -- and a belief that, as he has always done, he will show me the way and somehow, some way, i will simply Know.
and this....i first saw via the lovely Stephanie...and it made me cry -- sweet happy tears -- and now you know why...
things are moving around here. subtle, but profound shifts that leave you with that "Ooooh, now i get it" feeling.
good stuff. but it means change.
i'm not sure of the future (if any) of this space. i'm struggling with the purpose of it...ie. what was my original intention and where is it now? i am afraid that it has become a place to justify how we choose to live, rather than simply a chronicle of our days. it's just how it's become to feel whenever i think of posting.
i also want to be mindful of my children; of their journey, of how their future-selves will look back on this.
i feel less moved to document our lives with photos, strictly for the purpose of blogging here. i see how that works so beautifully for some families...and i love to visit with them...but it doesn't seem to capture who we are.
how do i capture the wild wind and the rain, and the fast-beating hearts of my faery children? because these are the things that are the pulse of my family....the feral days of paint and poetry...tomatoes for breakfast, the fire of our disagreements and the vast, vast love of our forgiving.
i look at the photographs and i know there is so much more to them...especially my beloved Sebastian- who seems to get very little air-time...only because of the elusiveness of his Bright and Shining soul. it is he who has taught me the most - even more than my magical girl - yet the one who i seem unable to share. at least, not yet.
so i'm still around. i'm peeping in your windows and leaving wild honey on your doorsteps.....
....but mostly we're going to follow the wild drum-beat of our souls....into the woods for a while.
it would seem that arting is mostly what we do these days...painting, art journals, sketching...forever we are on the hunt for the next thing to draw/paint/glue/imagine.
and because i'm taking up the 'big painting' wall-space.....she paints on the floor.
and then there was yesterday....we had a consultation with Ty the Piercing Guy (not actually what he calls himself, it rhymes so i felt i had to use it) -- he and his partner have the tattoo and piercing shop next door to my work....so all of our piercing and tattooing needs are taken care of by them -- such as those needs are. :)
Ty is a funny little man...lots of piercings (naturally), some body-modifications of the pointy-eared variety and a plethora of ink. he's also Very Serious about what he does. his standards of cleanliness would leave most hospitals wanting. we're talking aseptic. (and i happen to know about these things). i covet his autoclave. so of course i would trust my baby girls' ear lobes to him without a second thought.
BUT...she had to go through a bit of an 'interview' first. he's not in the habit of piercing minors. but since we're neighbours and all....
naturally (because we've been talking about it since she decided she wanted it done, way back in November), she passed muster. dazzling him, even, with her understanding of the process and the responsibilities therein ;)
she's quite pleased with herself and is diligent about the rather stringent cleansing guidelines Ty wrote out for her.
{inspired by Rabbit}
(can you see the hint of a sparkle in her ears?)
it was strange, actually...watching her chat, quite unconcerned she was, by Ty's rather striking appearance - surgical mask and all. thinking "wow...this is my daughter"...it took me back to the first time, way back, 8 years ago when she was born, and the first time i ever said those words -- 'my daughter' - and the weight of what that actually meant settled into my heart and forged itself to my soul.
somehow we ended up here...although we always do, don't we? end up where we are, that is.
life in these parts has been a blur of busy -- somehow the days ooze into one another and before we know it, an entire week has passed.
Monday was Savannah's 8th birthday {January 3rd} -- no photos of that...we absorbed the day and i must confess to not feeling camera-ish these days...something about the grey and bleak outside that does nothing to inspire me to take photographs. and there's something to be said for experiencing the day fully, without thought to how it will look afterwards in a blog-post. plus, i'm lazy and keep leaving the camera in places far from where i happen to be in times of inspiration.
so...we girls took ourselves (somewhat foolishly, as the Boxing Week sales were still on) to do some shopping. she had her Xmas gift-cards burning a hole in her pocket....and they were for bookstores and art-supply stores and Wally World (ack! but it meant a new game for her DSi)....which meant i got to hang out with her in bookstores and art-supply stores. suh-weet. there was a book on horses and a new bookmark (horsey, of coursey) and a GIANT Bristol sketchbook for the further pursuit of her latest obsession in large, mural-type drawings.
{the evolution of her horse drawings continues....}
there's also been....
a little science to go with our art
{clearly this happened BEFORE i took down the tree}
{foam robot assemblage}
oh - and more episodes of Merlin. we finished the first season last night -- and would you believe we have to WAIT until at least January 18th for the second season to be released on DVD (according to Amazon)?!?!
we're not sure we can wait until it becomes available on Netflix. we are, without a doubt, ADDICTED. i am not impressed at all with whomever is in charge of all this licensing and permissions business that makes it impossible for us to view episodes streaming from the U.S. hmph!
so now i'm on the hunt for a decent child-friendly version of the Arthurian legends...i don't want anything Disneyfied nor anything as dry as the old tomes. any suggestions?
oh - and a good do-it-mostly-yourself kids cookbook?
i woke up this morning (almost 8am - GASP!) to the sound of rain on the bedroom window. it seemed so perfect....the rain washing away what was left of 2010. then, when i got up and took Emma-dog out....i heard birds singing. (a real rarity around these parts in January). those things together confirmed for me that 2011 is going to be a really, really good year. you can, as do i, interpret good howsoever feels right to you.
goodies from the Big Box o' Art Supplies from Grandma L
i didn't get the house cleaned yesterday -- not for lack of effort. i was tidying up around here and there when i got sucked into the marathon of River Monsters on Discovery channel. B had put it on for Savannah while she was arting and before long, all three of us were glued in fascinated horror to the screen. (we shall not speak of the things that some fish do in the Amazon *shudder*) still, we learned a lot.
after that, we went up to my mom's for an early birthday party for Savannah. pizza, cake and ice-cream on the menu -- although we're all fairly food-ed out by now. and a few more just-what-i-always-wanted gifts to make her soul sing.
she has a passion for EXTREMELY LARGE mural-type drawings these days
my hopes for the Jane Austen movie marathon were not to be realized so i browsed the selection on NetFlix (our newest discovery -- we're trying out the free 30 days!) and made my choice...saw everyone else settled and then tucked myself into bed with a weiner dog, two cats and the first season of Merlin cued up {i do believe i have mentioned that i'm an utter dork...i'm also a sucker for all-things-Arthur..besides, Colin Morgan has the cutest dimples...but i digress}.
well, it was only a short time before it was me, a weiner dog, two cats and two snuggly kids.
Sebastian: "What are you watching....oooh! It's a knight!" (climbs in beside me -- "'scuse me cat...")
{a moment or two later}
Savannah: "Hey, what are you guys watching? Oh, can I watch too?" (scootches along disgruntled weiner dog)
{10 minutes pass}
B: "Oh, i wondered where everyone went to....anybody need anything?" (goes back to the History channel after refilling water bottles and bringing cookies)
i'm happily brainwashing sharing my interests of all-things-Arthur...although Sebastian's fondness for knights and dragons and Savannah's love of all-things-magic, make them easy marks students.
needless to say...it was a moste excellente way to spend New Year's Eve...we happily leave the parties and noise-makers and drunken buffoonery to more willing participants.
AND -- i have some utterly delectable mail-art to share....tomorrow....because i have just been engaged to paint with my favourite painting partners...;)
hope you're spending this day following your bliss...
busy. really busy. okay, maybe not so busy by regular-people standards...but for us slightly-hermity, difficult-transitiony, move-through-life-at-our-own-Zen-pacey type people...well, let's just say we are very glad it's over for another year. we paid our last visit yesterday and it was most enjoyable....but yes, it's over. *phew*
medieval knight costume from Grandma L.
he's very difficult to photograph when he's "in character"
oh, and he's actually a pirate, not a Knight...(he's workshopping new material)
there were more than a few declarations of this being "the BEST Christmas EVER!!" from the Shiny Ones...Savannah was orbiting the Earth several times in delight over her gifts. there was clear evidence of people really getting her this year....thoughtful choices that pleased her to no end, because being understood, i am discovering, is very, very important to her. but then again, don't we all like to feel understood?
relaxing between social obligations...colouring book and 'Beezus and Ramona' on audio-CD
and speaking of being understood...my Beloved, B knocked me three miles sideways and made me cry with his so-very-thoughtful gifts. we hadn't planned on really exchanging gifts this year - -money has been tight and we wanted to channel our available funds into gifts for the children -- but he (and his trusty sidekick, Savannah) got his hands on a flyer from an arts-supply store that i'd dreamily doodled hearts around things i'd loved to have had and made a couple of my wishes come true.
i know, right?
it wasn't so much the paints or the canvasses or the artist pencils, as it was me feeling well and truly loved. this journey of mine back into art and creativity has been a rocky one -- i've wrestled with the Shoulds and the Shouldn'ts of Motherhood vs. Creativity (finally realizing that is doesn't have to be a versus thing at all --- i know, you're thinking "Duh!"-- but hey, i had baggage..) and to have my heart's desire not only accepted, but supported and encouraged by my Dearest Loves...well...you can understand the happy sobbing.
and then there were the shrieks of delight and the fierce hugs of the girl-child who only wanted a Nintendo DS but ended up with the DSi XL -- (yeah, i didn't know the difference either) and quietly corrects anyone who calls it just a DS (and yup, that one made me cry too!) and Sebastian hugging every new item close to his chest and proclaiming 'thank you VERY much' to the air...
*sigh*
relaxing with a new book (no, she doesn't need glasses, she's hiding from the camera)
there were/are odd energies flying about, methinks, and i found the whole experience rather exhausting. i was awake and restless during the eclipse but unable to actually see it. so added to my series of restless nights, i'm thoroughly knackered.
but, there was...
a new scarf for Sebastian and a new wooly hat for B
a framed painting of mine for Savannah....
and books of paper airplane design and science experiments; a sticker books and a colouring book
Beauty and the Beast and Earth and The Silver Stallion...
and warmth and candle-light and a lovely roast chicken dinner.
but probably the best present of all was Savannah regaining her confidence on the back of a patient spotted pony named Lucy. she was grinning from ear-to-ear throughout the whole lesson and it confirmed for me that we did the right thing to move her to this much more nurturing and Real place.
and so...we're almost at Christmas. it's sort of hurry-up-and-wait at this point...a tiny bit of wrapping left, some nibbles to prepare for our Christmas Eve soiree tomorrow...but mostly i've shut down the busy-factory and encouraging kindness to ourselves.
wishing you all the very best of the season...much laughter, Light and joy...i'll see you all on the other side ;)
my current outlet for stress...origami is highly addictive (no scrap of paper is safe)
painting
"peace serpents" (a Savannah original-concept)
running in with tidbits about deer stampedes
chess
origami
on the phone to Laiba in Pakistan
snow-play
wrapping
writing
meltdowns and hysteria (sometimes even the children)
secrets in the cupboard
headaches and sore tummies
'the christians and the pagans' ;)
visiting
baking
cleaning (not even close to being done that yet)
poetry
knitting (all major projects finished...wooot!)
new movies
a solar system
Black Beauty audio-CD
.....and lots of deep breaths and cuddles.
it's truly difficult to hang onto peaceful life at this time of year. desperately i'd like to cocoon us in a fortress of solitude...but at the same time, we enjoy (mostly) the hustle and bustle of family and going and doing....
~*~
i'm not one for retrospectives and cringe at the thought of 'resolutions'.... but i am ruminating on some intentions for 2011....an aspect of which i've started over here.. it struck me as a most delightful project and one i intend to continue on past the month of January.
but for now...it's one day to the next until Xmas....and i don't mind admitting, i'll be glad when it's all over. ;)
a strange week...not entirely wonderful, not entirely horrific either. (my Nanna is getting better...gaining strength daily...many thanks for your assorted kindnesses)
so it's been a week of reflection, of counted blessings and deeper thought on what this time of year really means for us. it's also been a week of arguing and fighting and tears and temper and cuddles and proclamations of love.
handmade history hanging on our beautiful tree
yep. we've about covered it all.
Bashy's Solstice gift...a mini-version of B's scarf from last year
some of it i'll blame on (my)hormones...some of it i'll blame on the stresses that come with this season (and they do come, no matter how hard we try to maintain that state of inner peace and Presence)....some of it i'll blame on me not keeping all of the important stuff in perspective....and helping my Shinies do the same.
but let us not dwell on that which we cannot change. instead, we're moving forward, with new perspectives and new delights.
a gift from distant Devon....handmade JOY!
it's a rainy Sunday morning. i got up extra early so that i could hit the 24-hour Wal-Mart to finish up a few odds and ends of shopping...stocking stuffers for extended family and whatnot. (may i just mention how much i loathe that place?). i stopped in to get the newspaper and coffee for my Beloved B....just so he wouldn't have to go out in the drizzle when he woke up (that's just how much i *heart* him) and i'm sitting here with the tree lights twinkling in the early grey light, sipping my coffee and sinking deep into the peace.
the fruits of Savannah's and Auntie B's baking labours -- choccie-dipped cherry mice!
i know, right? :)
i wish i could articulate the swirling of thoughts and emotion in my head and heart. i wish i could share how blessed i feel to have a warm house and food on our table -- i know we don't have a lot, but we surely have enough.
it's been a difficult year -- financially and emotionally -- but i feel happier in all things than i remember ever feeling. perhaps it's the whittling down....the simplifying....the realizing of what truly matters.
full days this last while.....knitting, crafting, writing, playing, baking.....
our gift tag making evolved into Chrimbly card making. we don't *do* cards, as such -- but we thought we'd whip up a few for our immediate family members.
Sebastian *reads* me the crocodile story while i'm working in the kitchen....
taking up more or less permanent residence on the table....
makin' lava cakes...(yep, from A Box)
oh, yeah...they were realllllly goooooood!
in happy news - the car is back....complete with a new (to us) starter -- for much less than we'd dreaded imagined. we are soooo thankful for that.
in not-so-happy-but-then-happy-news -- my Nanna was taken to hospital today. i got a call at work from my dad -- she'd been admitted because of severe dehydration. she'd had tummy bug since Monday and wasn't drinking enough fluids to counteract the diarrhea she was experiencing. i'd spoken to my Gramps about that just last night...about how important it was for her to drink. three bags of IV fluids, blood tests and an x-ray later and she was sent home. phew! so she's on the mend....and we are EXTREMELY thankful for that! it was a very worrying day. any thoughts/prayers/candles/wishes for her continued good health would be very much appreciated. :)
and as such...i'm utterly exhausted....time for a cup of tea and a bit of quiet reading.
use up the Blockbuster gift cards from last year -- movies and snacks = movie night!!
alas, our faithful steed - ye olde automobile - having battled courageously on these last weeks with a dodgy distributor cap, decided that it had done it's part and now needs mechanical attention. (it always packs it in on a weekend) which meant a very cold bike ride to work for me this morning (i'm too cheap to take the bus unless the weather is horrific) and no trip to the movie store.
but we had just borrowed Santa Paws from Nanna so we watched that instead. we made a lovely roast pork dinner with mashed potatoes and gravy and green beans and pretended we were snowed in.
i'll refrain from a review -- suffice it to say, Savannah LOVED it and we must be more lenient in our tastes when it comes to holiday fare ;). it was cute. cheesy, but cute. ahem. i'm a "It's a Wonderful Life" and (the original) "Miracle on 34th Street" fan, myself -- and of course "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" and "The Muppet Family Christmas" are also huge favourites....
you know how you just Know when something is a Good Thing?
it's that deep intuitive - YES! *insert fist pump into air* -- or maybe it's more of a calm and breathy moment of exhale-and-immerse in the Rightness of it all.
yesterday was our first foray into a Pony Club event....they have monthly education sessions during the fall and winter months. the older, more experienced kids will teach the youngers or sometimes an *expert* is called in....it's all very hands-on and full of enthusiastic lust-for-interest-led-learning. which, in and of itself, turns my crank.
but the best thing about yesterday....in light of our current challenges...was the way my sweet, sweet, oh-so-reserved girl was the first to volunteer to try to put on a shipping bandage, how she was all answering-of-questions and wielding-of-hoofpicks, how she was right in there and oh, so HAPPY. (cue misty-eyed mama).
what a different world. such warm, welcoming people -- a barn that looks like a barn -- no pretensions, long-maned, shaggy-coated ponies; farm kitchens, don't-worry-about-your-shoes and please-come-we'll-find-her-something-to-ride.
and so we've arranged with one of the older girls - the lovely Allie - to take Savannah on as a student - where there's a shaggy, spotted pony that is Just Her Size who will help her rebuild the confidence that has been so heartbreakingly shaken.
after much discussion and affirmation that it's okay-if-she-doesn't-want-to, we've established that Savannah is desperately keen to carry on....and we were looking for the best way to help her do just that.
{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.
the lovely Rose has asked for some pictures* of the ongoing event that are Savannah's dreadlocks...
we're about two months in now....a work-in-progress (the mama's hands and arms ache and the child's sitting-still-ability factor dictates how long our maintenance sessions last). the weaving in of the loose and fly-away hairs seems to be the only maintenance she requires now....most of the 'locks having formed nicely. i chose to do numerous slender 'locks because she has fine hair and is a wee pixie of a child....
last session i wove some ribbon and embroidery floss into a select few -- partly as decorative inspiration, partly to assist the natural locking. there's also a few wooden beads in there somewhere.
i started them by back-combing but now use a combo of that and crocheting to tighten them up. live and learn. no products used, though. she washes them once a week with Dr.Bronner's shampoo....which works well to help the tightening/tangling.
she is madly in love with her dreads (as am i) -- and is officially the coolest kid in our neighbourhood (my slightly biased opinion), although her Auntie A was also most admiring of them at the party yesterday....
roll on spring and it's my turn...
*she is a most elusive creature and so i must apologize for the quality of these photos as they were taken guerilla-style as she played at the park. she has promised to let me snap some better photos after our next maintenance session.
so Samhain/Halloween is upon us....seems the year has flown by once again. where does it go?
and while it's mostly about the costumes and candy for the kids, for me it's time to reflect...on the year past and the year ahead; on things to hold onto and things to let go. lots of thoughts on this....but they are for another place. so we'll do the trick-or-treat thing and then we'll read the story of Grandfather Deer and leave an apple at the bedside, in the hopes that He'll visit us in our dreams....
our seasonal display -- mostly random treasures (plus my acorn fetish)
quite a few changes around our little patch this last year....B losing his job, us deciding to throw our lot in with dreams and a life lived less for The Man and more for the things we believe in. (a wonderful post over here about that).
but it's a life off the beaten path....and it can be lonely. like unschooling for grown-ups.
always a cool new leaf to be added
so this turn of the Wheel sees me letting go of old hurts and worn-out arguments....it's an ongoing process because forgetting doesn't come easily for me....
reflections in the early light
and as the ghosts of the old year pass through the thinning veil, into our lives i will invite - self-compassion and creativity; generosity of spirit and Presence of mind...
that the coming year shall fill our lives and those of our family and friends with love and laughter, warmth and sustenance; joy and light....and if some good books and new paints should be on offer, we'd happily invite those as well. ;)
we spent a leisurely morning...(french toast and smoothies for breakfast)...Savannah decided what she wants to learn next (telling time) and then we headed out to do some errands. which of course ended with a side-trip to the park....
although we don't reallyplan exactly what we do each day...we are finding our way back to a certain routine and rhythm. the lazy chaos of summer (and the heat-induced sloth) doesn't really suit us and it generally devolves into madness.
it was a warm and humid day again today -- nothing compared to summer -- but it meant lots of outdoor time. just how we like it.
i'm feeling very blessed for the life we lead....not always the easiest or most popular path...but so very worth it.
our annual (okay, second year in a row) pilgrimage to the French River -- to a little cabin by the river -- the children immersed themselves immediately in the wildness....computers, television, video-games all forgotten in an instant in favour of fishing poles and river-puddles.
and yes, Savannah is embarking on a dread-journey. after much discussion and research, we are in the process of dreading her hair. she's the coolest kid, ever.
amazing how a fishing pole in the river can ease the tensions of the busy-world. in the time it takes to bait the hook, the worries melt away.
for me, it was sunrises down by the river....pen-on-page meditations and reconnecting with dreams...
