Saturday, November 20, 2010

when good haircuts go bad

funny thing happened yesterday.

i suppose it's one of those childhood rites of passage know, those horror stories recounted with glee at family gatherings when the involved parties are decades older.

i suppose it was only a matter of time.

i should preface this by saying this is another one of those Truth in Advertising posts where i don't gloss over the gory details.

it was early evening and the kids and i had just returned from a visit with my mom and dad, B wasn't yet home from his day of running around various court-houses and law-firms doing assorted legally-paperworkish things....i was settling in with a cuppa for a bit of blog-reading and the kids were downstairs playing quietly.

that, Dear Reader, is when my maternal antennae should have been all a-quiver. "quietly". clearly, i was tired/couldn't be bothered/thankful for the peace.

Sebastian suddenly materialized beside me wearing assorted stickers on his face and wrapped up in twine. not unusual in itself, they have a rather strange dynamic at times, these two cherubim of mine.  but this latest escapade of attire could not disguise the fact that Savannah had evidently decided his hair needed a bit of a trim ("It was getting in his eyes!"). which he did. i just hadn't got around to it.

(photo taken this morning) 

here's where i'd like to say i handled it with the cool, calm and thoroughly Zen attitude of a more enlightened mother who of course realizes, It's just hair, She's expressing her independence, It's of little importance in the Grand Scheme of Things, Bashy doesn't mind, It doesn't look that bad....and other such  wisdoms. and there's also the monumental irony of her dreadlocks which some people would consider the epitome of Hair Crimes and view with downright revulsion...and not only have i supported her decision but also aided and abetted their creation. what kind of mother am i?

but this is my baby boy.

and his beautiful golden hair.

after i attempted to make it even, he looked less like a victim of a nuclear accident but it really, really, really bugged me. really.

and i told Savannah so.

and i forbid her to EVER do anything like that again.  (amongst other recriminations that i don't even remember in my moment of angst over the hairdo).  all of which i felt horrible about after having time to calm down.

so what's the deal?  who was that person who reared her authoritarian head and FREAKED OUT over a bad haircut?

alas, it seems i still have vestiges of the Curse Of Caring What Other People Think.

which really sucks because i thought i'd risen above that. i mean, i do rise above that -- on a daily basis, even. and to think i had a moment  (okay, several) over something as superficial as hair. ugh.

maybe it had something to do with my own baggage about bad haircuts. one too many during high school...

but mostly it's got me thinking.  i'll let you know what i come up with. if anything.

ps. Savannah is utterly cool with the whole thing, she regarded my freak-out with much bemusement. she is clearly more enlightened than i. and yes, i apologized for getting crabby and saying ridiculous things.


  1. I freaked out too a couple of weeks age when I returned from from a day out to find that my HUSBAND had decided to clipper my two year olds head, shearing off his soft baby locks with a number four buzz cut.

    Not a happy mummy, and I didn't apologise.

    Still haven't.

  2. Tee hee - I love his smiling face! I think this is the hard side of unschooling. You truly are letting them learn, no one can learn without mistakes and maybe he is happier without so much hair? *grin* And it will grow back..... And in years to come you will find this funny. It might take years. Not being a Mum, it is much much easier for me to see the more humorous side now.

    It also reminds me a story my Mum tells about me. I was pre-school so younger then 5. I decided to wear a pair of knickers on my head and refused to take them off on the way to playschool. My Mum was running out of time and the will to fight so she said fine and off we went. The lady who ran the playgroup apparently gave me a LOOK. One of such strength that the knickers vanished and I never wore them on my head again....

  3. kellyi - GASP! oh, my. yeah, i'd be less forgiving if B had done that. lol

    Rose -- that is SO funny....oddly, one of my children wearing their gitch on their head probably would bother me less than this haircut. not sure what that says about me...:)

  4. Mmm.
    Mine did it last year.
    Trev cut Maddie's braids right off.
    And did a number on his own, too.
    His is recovered, a year later, but Maddie's is still barely coming along. Have you noticed that one braid is three inches longer than the other?
    I cried.

  5. ~ok i am trying really REALLY really hard not to laugh...i know it is not funny but it so is...i say this because i have been there!!! for the love of hair right...why we can get so worked up over something that quickly grows right back!!! in august i was giving our littlest a quick little clean up the day before he was going to make his debut as a ring bearer in my cousins wedding {yes, what the heck was i thinking doing this the day before...well kind of like you...i was getting to it...just not top of the list} mind you i l♥ved his free flowing wild hair that suits him perfectly but thought to myself...especially after my uncle had said a few days before to me..."when was the last time he had a he going to go in and get cleaned up before the wedding" so i took this as a huge hint and allowed the thoughts of another to take over my own...clippers came out and torture it always is...well our oldest thought it would be ever so funny to jump out and give us a scare to make his brother laugh while i was in the middle of zipping through one little hair...yikes...a huge patch of hair dropped to the ground...and in a moment of panic..allowed furry to take over...i am calm...i am patient...i am VERY understanding a rarely raise my voice...but i am human!!! i yelled and cried all at the same my oldest is looking at me in amusement saying "whats the big deal...i was just trying to cheer him up and it just hair will grow" i stopped in my tracks and just started true his words were...its just hair...he still was my little and looked cute as a button all neatly buzzed!! be gently to yourself...we all have our moments!! much l♥ve and light upon you and yours~

  6. oh. Stephanie. *weeps for Maddie's braids* Yep, i would've cried.

    faerwillow -- you're right -- it IS funny -- i'm getting to that place now (and getting used to Sebastian's new 'do)....but oh, so devastating at the time.

  7. So the kid wants to gow up to be a hairdresser!
    I've seen worse from professionals. Go kid!


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