tuesday

Sebastian was awake at 4am.  the new moon is just around the corner...i have no other explanation, really. B had insomnia and slept less than four hours. i got up at 5 am, after having dozed while listening to the boy singing along with a DVD.

i had an 11 am appointment at the bank -- discussions of consolidation, an effort to simplify debt.  evidently you're not to be helped if you don't own a home.  which is fine.  we'll carry on as we were...i refuse to believe the cornerstone of success lies in brick and mortar. it's in the banks' best interest, after all, to keep you owing.

and so, when the menfolk lay themselves down for an afternoon nap and Savannah was outside playing,  i went down to the art cave and i painted.

painted away the doubt...which wasn't hard...the doubt clings less these days. it's rather more a half-hearted attempt to bring us back under the umbrella of the Busy World. i have absolute faith that things will turn out just fine.

it isn't finished yet. i still have to do something with the hands. this week we're painting a memory....siphoning emotion onto the paper. and it reminded me that true success in life, as in painting, requires us to be fearless.